February 24, 2010
February 22, 2010
Another Busy Weekend!
Another busy weekend from our house with a total of zero photos from the momentous times!
Saturday -
Sunday -
For those either concerned or who would know what I mean - Abby has made no movement towards a movement since Thursday. Her little body even resisted medicinal intervention. I kind of fear what she has done to her poor daycare teachers today on that front...
Saturday -
- Anny and Abby went to the County Science Fair in the morning to greet the student-participants from Anny's school. Abby always enjoys new places, but the strange thing was that the host school is practically identical in design to Anny's - so Abby was a little put off that "THE GATOR!" was not present.
- After that the girls went to the mall, and ended up getting there before it opened. I tell you, the only people at Malls these days are teens trying to escape their parents, and parents of little ones trying to occupy some weekend time. They played in the playground for a while, got a soft pretzel and then rode the carousel before heading home.
- While the girls played, I was at a Presbytery Meeting on the other side of the river. It went off without many hitches (those all came ten days ago when a new location had to be found and readied at a moments notice). They even started right on time and, more strangely, ended right at the docketed time. I am proud of the decisions made by the members that I serve, even if others are not.
- After dinner we got to
babysit(weird word for me - just not really one that I use...) watch one of Abby's friends so that his parents could go to an evening party for work. The two little ones had an insane amount of fun together, and somehow both drifted off to sleep without any hesitation! His parents stopped back at our place on their way home to pick him up. A sleepover without the "over" part.
Sunday -
- The unfortunate part of missing the "over" part of the sleep over is that Abby woke up and then wanted to play with her friend right away. "My friend is asleep in my pack-and-play. I want to play with him." Oh, sweetie, he went home... They were back together in Sunday School, so all was well!
- Before church we had Abby take a shower with Anny (a normal Sunday thing) to wash her hair and make sure it was wet long enough to.... give her a first hair cut! She has had her bangs cut several times to make sure that she can see, but the hair on the back has been getting tangled very easily. Anny grabbed the scissors and cut about an inch and a half or maybe two inches off of the the back! No, we did not save it, and yes, her bouncy curls bounced right back up. She's not a fan of scissors that close to her head, so there are no pictures from the event as I was tasked with keeping her faced forward.
- After a shorter-than-normal Sunday morning at church we drove down to Burke to celebrate the first birthday of a friends' son. He is a cutie and was incredibly overwhelmed and excited to have so many people in his home! Abby kicked things off by smashing his little hands in the toy box lid. She quickly got a time out and we all moved on, but I can promise you that there were two embarrassed parents in that room!
- When we got home Anny knew there was only one thing she would be doing - avoiding me and my affair with Olympic hockey. Such a great day for the sport. Abby and I watched a lot, and Anny did watch a little.
- With Chipotle rounding our weekend out, it was a wonderful weekend! I should hope to have many more like it and I'd be one happy camper.
For those either concerned or who would know what I mean - Abby has made no movement towards a movement since Thursday. Her little body even resisted medicinal intervention. I kind of fear what she has done to her poor daycare teachers today on that front...
February 21, 2010
Halfway There
Okay, after seven months of pushing, prodding and little success, Abby Roe has begun to use the potty! She's still stuck on the #2 side of things, but the progress that has been made is being considered a win in our happy little home.
Because our journey was long - and hard sometimes - I wanted to share with you some of the lighter side stuff. Now realize that this is only funny in retrospect and each ranked on a scale of beyond-annoying to this-side-of-angry, but perspective changes when you child goes from diapers to "No, I will do it by myself Dally" in the span of ten days.
As an important piece of info - we decided to just go the diaper-less route for a day or two to facilitate her training. We tried this in June. And July. And August. And so on... So, enjoy some of our frustration:
I'll Be Right Back
One morning Anny told Abby "I'm going to put the laundry away and when I come back we'll sit on the potty for a minute, okay?" Abby gleefully exclaimed "OKAY!" Once Anny turned the corner you can guess what Abby did.
Yes, she is so stubborn that she needed to go but refused to participate so much that she let loose on the floor in a 30 second span.
Not That Kind of Wii, Sweetie
While Anny was out I had Abby diaper-free. We did the normal "talk" about when you need to potty, let me know and I'll get you there, but we're going to sit on the potty in fifteen minutes. Wow did that story become routine. When I took a minute to myself to go to the potty I came out to an agitated Abby - doing the "I have pee on my socks" dance. As it would turn out, Abby was looking out of one of our big windows while standing on my WiiFit Board when she unleashed her whiz.
She Wee-Wee's on my Wii. It was immediately bleach cleaned and I haven't been on it since. Just weirds me out a little bit.
No Laughing Matter (i.e. the TMI part for non-parent-types)
We're still a bit stumped on the poop front. She refused for the whole weekend - which is a huge concern in my book. Looks like we may change up what we give her for dinner and snack when she's home. More fruits, less fruit snacks. I would say "I'll keep you updated" but I hope that it's a matter that goes away quietly and you never hear about again, unless it's of particular humor. Or grossness.
So please, take a moment to laugh at us. Now we can really say that we are laughing with you, because NOW it is funny.
Because our journey was long - and hard sometimes - I wanted to share with you some of the lighter side stuff. Now realize that this is only funny in retrospect and each ranked on a scale of beyond-annoying to this-side-of-angry, but perspective changes when you child goes from diapers to "No, I will do it by myself Dally" in the span of ten days.
As an important piece of info - we decided to just go the diaper-less route for a day or two to facilitate her training. We tried this in June. And July. And August. And so on... So, enjoy some of our frustration:
I'll Be Right Back
One morning Anny told Abby "I'm going to put the laundry away and when I come back we'll sit on the potty for a minute, okay?" Abby gleefully exclaimed "OKAY!" Once Anny turned the corner you can guess what Abby did.
Yes, she is so stubborn that she needed to go but refused to participate so much that she let loose on the floor in a 30 second span.
Not That Kind of Wii, Sweetie
While Anny was out I had Abby diaper-free. We did the normal "talk" about when you need to potty, let me know and I'll get you there, but we're going to sit on the potty in fifteen minutes. Wow did that story become routine. When I took a minute to myself to go to the potty I came out to an agitated Abby - doing the "I have pee on my socks" dance. As it would turn out, Abby was looking out of one of our big windows while standing on my WiiFit Board when she unleashed her whiz.
She Wee-Wee's on my Wii. It was immediately bleach cleaned and I haven't been on it since. Just weirds me out a little bit.
No Laughing Matter (i.e. the TMI part for non-parent-types)
We're still a bit stumped on the poop front. She refused for the whole weekend - which is a huge concern in my book. Looks like we may change up what we give her for dinner and snack when she's home. More fruits, less fruit snacks. I would say "I'll keep you updated" but I hope that it's a matter that goes away quietly and you never hear about again, unless it's of particular humor. Or grossness.
So please, take a moment to laugh at us. Now we can really say that we are laughing with you, because NOW it is funny.
February 18, 2010
Book Review: Raising an Emotionally Healthy Child...
For those of you who do not know, I have Focal Segmental Glomerulonephritis - or FSGS - which is a kidney disease. I have had the disease for a long time now, about nine years. (Full story begins HERE and meanders throughout my blog.) It is not something that I talk about often because I have friends that have it much worse off than I do, but it is something that I live with every day and am thoughtful of at every meal (no potassium, thankyouverymuch) and the twice a day that I take medicine.
Whether I like it or not, it is also something that I think about often as I look at Abby. My form of this disease is in no way hereditary - go back to that first link and you'll see that it came from a specific incident and not from my genes. That is a blessing in reality. What I get to thinking about is that my lifespan will likely be shorter than my healthy counterparts. I am not to the point of needing a transplant, and my current nephrologist has never even mentioned one, which is a good sign.
Abby is two and a half and very unaware of my illness, which is a good thing. I can fake that I'm feeling well most of the time that I don't, and when I'm really fatigued I can be open enough with Anny and ask her to compensate for me and things go off around the house without a hiccup. I can acknowledge that this is a reality that will not last forever, and I don't want it to. We were fully aware of my health concerns before Abby, heck we knew about it before we were married.
With that knowledge in mind, last year I ordered a book on Amazon called "Raising an Emotionally Healthy Child When a Parent is Sick" by Paula Rauch and Anna Muriel based on a Massachusetts General Hospital program that both are involved in. There are hundreds of books that have been written about how to be a (healthy) parent to a child with health issues (emotionally, physically, you name it), but very few written about those of us who are unwell with a full-fledged energy machine in the house.
I found this book incredibly knowledgeable and diverse. It is not written about parents with kidney disease. It is not written about parents with cancer. It's not written about parents with multiple sclerosis. At the same time, it's written about all of us. There are many things that make my disease different from others, but there are also many things that we all struggle with together, so the book is very universal.
The early chapters are dedicated to stages of childhood development, from infant straight through post-college. The basic focus of the chapters is effective and appropriate communication with your child - and that openness and honesty trumps hiding things. This is a personal mantra of mine as well, so maybe that's why the book was perfect for me.
The book is also very frank about every step of the journey of someone with a chronic illness - from nagging pain and official diagnosis all the way through funeral planning. There are lots of great ideas about things to do to set up traditions with your child no matter their age at the time of diagnosis, and ways to honor those traditions upon your passing.
There is a large chunk dedication to ways to continue to maintain a fairly-normal home life, even if you are stuck in a hospital by using a team of people to communicate about your condition and assist your co-parent with the daily things that have to occur as a parent. To be honest, I got more out of that section of the book than a lot of the rest. I know a lot about child development and have been a part of the end-of-life process for several people whom I cared about. I had never thought about how to assemble a team of able-bodied people to help with the mundane that would be both helpful for me and my family and give people a way to help. Very interesting stuff.
I think that the bottom line of this book is that it is a book about parenting first - communication, asking for help when you need it, honesty and planning a legacy for your child and family when you die. The book is thorough about a lot of different aspects of parenting and illness, while being concise enough to be a fairly quick read, even for a non-book-reader like me. I would highly recommend this book to someone who has a chronic disease and people who rely on them for daily care.
Whether I like it or not, it is also something that I think about often as I look at Abby. My form of this disease is in no way hereditary - go back to that first link and you'll see that it came from a specific incident and not from my genes. That is a blessing in reality. What I get to thinking about is that my lifespan will likely be shorter than my healthy counterparts. I am not to the point of needing a transplant, and my current nephrologist has never even mentioned one, which is a good sign.
Abby is two and a half and very unaware of my illness, which is a good thing. I can fake that I'm feeling well most of the time that I don't, and when I'm really fatigued I can be open enough with Anny and ask her to compensate for me and things go off around the house without a hiccup. I can acknowledge that this is a reality that will not last forever, and I don't want it to. We were fully aware of my health concerns before Abby, heck we knew about it before we were married.
With that knowledge in mind, last year I ordered a book on Amazon called "Raising an Emotionally Healthy Child When a Parent is Sick" by Paula Rauch and Anna Muriel based on a Massachusetts General Hospital program that both are involved in. There are hundreds of books that have been written about how to be a (healthy) parent to a child with health issues (emotionally, physically, you name it), but very few written about those of us who are unwell with a full-fledged energy machine in the house.
The early chapters are dedicated to stages of childhood development, from infant straight through post-college. The basic focus of the chapters is effective and appropriate communication with your child - and that openness and honesty trumps hiding things. This is a personal mantra of mine as well, so maybe that's why the book was perfect for me.
The book is also very frank about every step of the journey of someone with a chronic illness - from nagging pain and official diagnosis all the way through funeral planning. There are lots of great ideas about things to do to set up traditions with your child no matter their age at the time of diagnosis, and ways to honor those traditions upon your passing.
There is a large chunk dedication to ways to continue to maintain a fairly-normal home life, even if you are stuck in a hospital by using a team of people to communicate about your condition and assist your co-parent with the daily things that have to occur as a parent. To be honest, I got more out of that section of the book than a lot of the rest. I know a lot about child development and have been a part of the end-of-life process for several people whom I cared about. I had never thought about how to assemble a team of able-bodied people to help with the mundane that would be both helpful for me and my family and give people a way to help. Very interesting stuff.
I think that the bottom line of this book is that it is a book about parenting first - communication, asking for help when you need it, honesty and planning a legacy for your child and family when you die. The book is thorough about a lot of different aspects of parenting and illness, while being concise enough to be a fairly quick read, even for a non-book-reader like me. I would highly recommend this book to someone who has a chronic disease and people who rely on them for daily care.
February 17, 2010
Wordless Wednesday: Choices
(not so wordless - this is of Abby choosing a reward for her Potty Training success! Huzzah!!)
More Wordless Fun at www.wordlesswednesday.com
More Wordless Fun at www.wordlesswednesday.com
February 16, 2010
Not An Accident
I truly believe that my daughter is more valuable than any other child. You should think the same about yours. I think that is a great starting point for being a parent.
I realized that Anny and I have not honestly shared our story, and there might be someone who wants to or needs to hear it. We know many people who "just tried once or twice" to get pregnant, and while we are always elated for them, it always reminds us of our journey.
Be forewarned, I write about my sex life in this post, but I assure you that part is brief. There some details will be more than you ever wanted to know about me and my wife, but they are not gory or gruesome. There are details of our lives that I keep to myself, believe it or not. Feel free to hit the "back" button on your browser. I'll have a cute Abby picture post later this week.
As a quick refresher: Anny and I met in the summer of 1999. We knew each other for about six months before she was completely bored and called me to go to Baltimore for the day. We became close friends shortly thereafter. We were best friends by the start of summer camp in 2000 and began dating around mid-summer (I'm sure I could dig up the date if I had to). In 2001 we were engaged and married in March of 2002. (The last date I know without a doubt!)
In 2003 we made a trip for Presidents Day to visit Paul and Sarahlynn whereupon they told us that they were having a child! Anny and I were of course elated, but our tone of conversation quickly changed, even before we boarded the airplane to head for home on Monday. We had obviously talked about having children before we were married, that is the responsible thing to do. We had joked and talked about timing and names and all of those silly things that hopeful people do, but something changed with that monkey picture that was so neatly wrapped for us that night. All of the sudden a switch went off for Anny, and we had to talk through that.
Shortly thereafter we had to talk through all of the even-more-fun-than-poking-yourself-in-the-eye (at least to a 24 year old man!) conversations about how many children, how could we afford such a burden, how big of a house would we require for our brood, et cetera. Some of these conversations were wonderful and fun - let's have six children so that they can all play hockey together and not have to play with others! - but some were very hard - if I make $X.00 and you make $Y.00 but we need $X.00 + $Y.00 + $Z,ZZZ.00 to make this happen, how do we make this work? A big question that we had to jump through was whether or not there was a chance to pass on my kidney disease to any offspring we had, because that was a big deal for me. I checked with my nephrologist on this one and we're safe.
We talked each other off of a couple of ledges over the course of a couple of weeks and decided that we would join Paul and Sarahlynn in their joyous time and get pregnant and have children at around the same time - maybe about six months apart, but certainly close enough to share a wonderful bond with each other and make everyone in the world gasp at how perfect they would both be.
A month went by after Anny went off of "the" pill with nothing - no baby, no period - nothing. We were young and enjoying "trying" to make a baby, so we didn't really notice. Another month went by and Anny got to questioning things, but I was still having fun sex more often than before, so I saw nothing really wrong. Month after month went by with nothing to show for our efforts but a happy husband and a growing-depressed wife. Don't get me wrong, I was disappointed, but for a male who spent my work life revolved around children, I was getting my cute-kid fix often without having one of my own. Heck, I had even picked up a second job at the church working with youth, so I was really happy.
After Ellie was born things really ramped up and
For almost a year (this was over the course of 2004-2005) we were under the care of a professional fertility clinic - subscribing to their very strenuous schedules and tests, all of which are "normal" as a part of the program and I think are designed to prove to them that you really want to be a parent. Anny would drive from Manassas to Fairfax and back, before school began, three or four times a week for blood tests and other tests, and we drove to different places as necessary (luckily on weekends mostly) for Intra-Uterine Insemination (IUI) treatments when her body was "ready" for that step in the process.
We went through the process three or four times - I could tell you from bank records - without any success at all. I was ready to have conversation about adoption or being Childless-But-Happy, as many people are, but every time it came up we got into huge fights that ended with one of us in tears and the other steaming mad. The role changed each time, I think. I will not say that it took its toll on our marriage as it does to some other people, though. I think that because of our "failure" we had a lot of honest conversations that people tend to avoid, and that continues now. (Silver Lining, or something like that.)
In 2005 we moved from Manassas, VA to Maryland. I moved in March and Anny had to stay back in VA until school was over in June. We had made the decision that this was best for us as a married couple, though would mean tricky times for procreation. Meeting up at the IHOP twice a week in Vienna was not exactly ideal, though I might have made the offer on more than one occasion! We decided to stop what we had been doing and start from scratch when we were settled in on the other side of the river.
Anny moved up to join me in Maryland as soon as school let out, and my Aunt moved out of the house in August, right as school was starting for Anny. Not an ideal situation - new school, new year, new everything - to start things back up, but the fertility clinic had a location close to her work. So we started the process of IUI again during the summer. On the first time "back in the saddle" we had success and got to see our little "Smudge" (which began Abby's own site).
During the process of repeated IUI treatments we kept things to ourselves and a very small group of people who knew - supervisors at work and a few friends. I am not sure if that was a blessing or a curse, though. It was harder for me to keep things quiet - as is obvious because I keep a blog, and hard for Anny to talk to other people about it because of the intimate privacy that is associated with it.
Bottom line - Abby is the only thing in the world that Anny and I have ever truly yearned for or wanted. She is our everything.
*This post was originally written in a defensive stance. Someone whose sense of humor is not tolerated around me anymore called Abby an "accident" while she was playing. I wrote this post shortly thereafter. I realized that I did not want Abby to ever read this and have it come across as negative, so it has been re-written. Some of the sentiment may still remain, and I hope that you will look past that. Thanks.
February 12, 2010
I Read a Book!
True confessions - I'm not a book reader. I know, shocker, right? I used to love the newspaper, but could not allot time each day to read it, so we got rid of our delivery service and now buy it only when there is something special happening - like Black Friday Sales. The only magazines I read these days are parenting mags, and that's not a bad thing. (Okay, you caught me. I read Better Homes and Gardens for decorating ideas and a variety of good recipes!)
Books on the other hand... Books intimidate me. A newspaper is not daunting - you can read a section or two andtoss recycle compost it. Bonus if I get started on the crossword and don't get too frustrated to quit after a few words. Magazines are great because they are very short term, we even have a system in our house. (I'm all about routine these days, what can I say?)
I have never been a good book reader, either. It's a trait that I hope Abby does not pick up on. Part of the reason I read this particular book from cover to cover, so that she saw me reading for me, not just for her. I want her to want to read - to read for fun and to not feel like when someone says in a staff meeting "I think we should all read this book" that she needs to run and hide because the reality is she will not make time or energy for it.
Part of the blame I place squarely on... just kidding. I had great role models in reading - I grew up surrounded by books of all shapes and sizes. A lot of those books still reside in my basement - everything from Gone With the Wind to The Handyman's Guide To (fill in the blank - we have them all), from Animal Farm to Biblical Studies. In every age of school I was encouraged, even required to read everything from biographies to plays. I've just never been able to get excited about it for more than a book at a time.
And I've come to realize that it's okay.
I have trouble keeping up with fiction and all of the characters. I guess that I'm too literal of a person, or something like that. I really liked Cry the Beloved Country for the plot line, but could not keep the characters separated from one another. I had the same issues with most fictional books I've read. The only reason that I had desire to read Courage Under Fire (good book, kept my attention.) was because I told myself I could not see the movie unless I read the book. Yup, a movie was motivation enough for me to read the book.
Non-Fiction seems to be the best route for me when I read, and I'm finding that books categorized mostly as "self help" are where I can get excited. Goes back to the "too practical" statement earlier. The last book I read was in the spring of 2007, before Abby was born. It was about pregnancy from a Dads perspective, and also covered the first six months or so of being a parent. Good stuff. Helped to calm me about the "what ifs" as we faced the final months of pregnancy and first few months of parenting. (Yes, I said "we" and "pregnancy" in the same sentence. I didn't push a child out, but I dealt with just about everything else, so it's a "we" thing. Get over it.)
The book that I have just finished is of a similar vain - really applicable to me not just in the short term, but in the long run as well. I'll review the book in the next week, but for me it's important to write down how I got to this point, and why reading a book is significant for me.
That is all.
Books on the other hand... Books intimidate me. A newspaper is not daunting - you can read a section or two and
- 15th - Magazine for next month arrives - glance through
- 1st - read through the articles that look good, glance through recipes
- 15th - read the rest that are mildly appealing - read recipes and mark those we want to try
- 30/31/28th - cut out recipes that warrant taste testing and recycle the magazine (since we have the next issue in hand!)
I have never been a good book reader, either. It's a trait that I hope Abby does not pick up on. Part of the reason I read this particular book from cover to cover, so that she saw me reading for me, not just for her. I want her to want to read - to read for fun and to not feel like when someone says in a staff meeting "I think we should all read this book" that she needs to run and hide because the reality is she will not make time or energy for it.
Part of the blame I place squarely on... just kidding. I had great role models in reading - I grew up surrounded by books of all shapes and sizes. A lot of those books still reside in my basement - everything from Gone With the Wind to The Handyman's Guide To (fill in the blank - we have them all), from Animal Farm to Biblical Studies. In every age of school I was encouraged, even required to read everything from biographies to plays. I've just never been able to get excited about it for more than a book at a time.
And I've come to realize that it's okay.
I have trouble keeping up with fiction and all of the characters. I guess that I'm too literal of a person, or something like that. I really liked Cry the Beloved Country for the plot line, but could not keep the characters separated from one another. I had the same issues with most fictional books I've read. The only reason that I had desire to read Courage Under Fire (good book, kept my attention.) was because I told myself I could not see the movie unless I read the book. Yup, a movie was motivation enough for me to read the book.
Non-Fiction seems to be the best route for me when I read, and I'm finding that books categorized mostly as "self help" are where I can get excited. Goes back to the "too practical" statement earlier. The last book I read was in the spring of 2007, before Abby was born. It was about pregnancy from a Dads perspective, and also covered the first six months or so of being a parent. Good stuff. Helped to calm me about the "what ifs" as we faced the final months of pregnancy and first few months of parenting. (Yes, I said "we" and "pregnancy" in the same sentence. I didn't push a child out, but I dealt with just about everything else, so it's a "we" thing. Get over it.)
The book that I have just finished is of a similar vain - really applicable to me not just in the short term, but in the long run as well. I'll review the book in the next week, but for me it's important to write down how I got to this point, and why reading a book is significant for me.
That is all.
February 11, 2010
I Missed Wednesday
I missed out on Wordless Wednesday this week, but wanted to share this picture on the blog for those who are not on Facebook. There are a ton more on our Flickr Photostream, too.
We got 27 inches of snow from Friday to Saturday last week. By the time we dug out on Monday another batch came in and dumped a lot more. I could not get a good measurement because the second storm brought terrible winds with it and we had drifts. The hole that I dug for Abby in the picture above is no longer able to be seen because she snow whipped back into it with the wind!
We were lucky in that we did not lose power. My brother and his wife stayed with us on Saturday night because they DID lose power and needed warmth.
The storm has given us opportunity to spend time with our neighbors in a very relaxed condition. We've helped each other dig out, too, but that's not nearly as fun as dinner! We had to get out or invite people over to keep from snipping at each other from being pent up for a whole week!
The other big project we have been working on is Potty Training Abby! In a moment of accidental providence, we did not stock up on diapers before the storm. We could not get out to get any until Monday, even if we had wanted to. We had about 8 diapers, and we told her as such. On Saturday we had a couple of accidents, but a little success too. On Monday the ratio skewed the other way and we had more accidents than we would have liked. On Wednesday we had no accidents at all! Maybe this was just really good timing for a snowstorm for our household...
We are planning a trip to North Carolina this weekend, but I'm hearing about some more snow being predicted. We are going to have to make a decision this evening and stick with it. I really want to go, but we won't do anything that might mean we're stuck away from home either.
We got 27 inches of snow from Friday to Saturday last week. By the time we dug out on Monday another batch came in and dumped a lot more. I could not get a good measurement because the second storm brought terrible winds with it and we had drifts. The hole that I dug for Abby in the picture above is no longer able to be seen because she snow whipped back into it with the wind!
We were lucky in that we did not lose power. My brother and his wife stayed with us on Saturday night because they DID lose power and needed warmth.
The storm has given us opportunity to spend time with our neighbors in a very relaxed condition. We've helped each other dig out, too, but that's not nearly as fun as dinner! We had to get out or invite people over to keep from snipping at each other from being pent up for a whole week!
The other big project we have been working on is Potty Training Abby! In a moment of accidental providence, we did not stock up on diapers before the storm. We could not get out to get any until Monday, even if we had wanted to. We had about 8 diapers, and we told her as such. On Saturday we had a couple of accidents, but a little success too. On Monday the ratio skewed the other way and we had more accidents than we would have liked. On Wednesday we had no accidents at all! Maybe this was just really good timing for a snowstorm for our household...
We are planning a trip to North Carolina this weekend, but I'm hearing about some more snow being predicted. We are going to have to make a decision this evening and stick with it. I really want to go, but we won't do anything that might mean we're stuck away from home either.
February 04, 2010
I Thought She was Possessed
Abby has been coughing mildly for about a week. It kept her up during nap time at school on Wednesday, so we decided to give her medicine before bed, partly to calm the cough but also partly to get her a better night of sleep. This is not the first time we've used this, and won't be the last. But she might not get it again tonight.
Last night at 11:30ish I was awoken by Abby. Right at midnight on the clock in her room she woke me up again. At that point, I could not sleep. I was completely freaked out. I feared that we had given her too much medicine and that she was hallucinating scenes from her new love, Sleeping Beauty. We skip the scene toward that end that Anny has deemed "too scary" but there is still some spooky stuff in there. Since I don't care for the movie particularly, I was very much inclined right about midnight to find out copy and break it in half.
The first time I went into her room, Abby was sitting straight up with her eyes wide like she had just had a sip of coke for the first time. (An assumption, of course...) She, as usual, was calling "MOMMY!" which is funny because mommy almost never gets up with her.
Through her wide, scary eyes she was reciting what could have been a mantra, and the first time I chalked it up to a song from school:
"I am listening and I can hear... It's cold in here... Dally I don't like the fire anymore... Daddy, turn off the fire please..." Over and over. If you're a parent, you know that voice that is as much whine as concern? Yeah, that was the voice she was using.
Again, the first time I figured she was just startled, but when she did this again at midnight, on the nose, I began to freak out a bit. She asked me to turn off her humidifier, and she calmly drifted back to sleep. In an effort to combat the cough, I turned it back on once she was out.
But not me. I laid awake trying to figure out what medicine we had given her (which I genuinely did not know, I was at a meeting.) and how much and whether or not she was having a bad acid trip. Since Anny is not feeling 100% either, she took medicine and has no recollection of the nights activities, which I realized was the case as they were going on so I could not rely on her for help or insight.
So I laid there. Helplessly thinking about what we may or may not have inflicted on our beloved daughter. I finally could not stand it anymore, so I got up and went into her room. I felt for a fever. Nope. I checked her pulse, which was normal for her. I woke her up just enough to know that she was conscious again. I was so concerned that I gave her the riot act - what is your name, who am I, give me a kiss - things that she all did, and probably thought it was a game. To me, it was not a game. I needed answers.
She looked again with the big eyes and asked for a "colder pillow" so I flipped hers. That worked. She laid her head down and once again started with "Dally I don't like the fire anymore... Daddy, turn off the fire please..."
This time she pointed, though. This time, she put my mind at ease. This time, you see, she was able to tell me what the problem was. It seems that Abby, in her deepest of sleep, could not use a five syllable word. The whole conversation would have been different before if she could have, but it never occurred to her or to me that she might be saying:
"I am listening and I can hear...
It's cold in here...
Dally I don't like the HUMIDI-fire anymore...
Daddy, turn off the HUMIDIFIER please..."
Stupid cow humidifier that puts out a bit of fog that can be taken as smoke in the head of a 2 year old. She was not scared. She was not concerned. She was genuinely being bothered by her humidifier and wanted it turned off. The wide eyes were surely because it was just too dark and she was looking for the noise.
I turned off the humidifier, she laid down and was out almost instantly.
And I laid awake again. This time frustrated that I did not ask the right questions.
Last night at 11:30ish I was awoken by Abby. Right at midnight on the clock in her room she woke me up again. At that point, I could not sleep. I was completely freaked out. I feared that we had given her too much medicine and that she was hallucinating scenes from her new love, Sleeping Beauty. We skip the scene toward that end that Anny has deemed "too scary" but there is still some spooky stuff in there. Since I don't care for the movie particularly, I was very much inclined right about midnight to find out copy and break it in half.
The first time I went into her room, Abby was sitting straight up with her eyes wide like she had just had a sip of coke for the first time. (An assumption, of course...) She, as usual, was calling "MOMMY!" which is funny because mommy almost never gets up with her.
Through her wide, scary eyes she was reciting what could have been a mantra, and the first time I chalked it up to a song from school:
"I am listening and I can hear... It's cold in here... Dally I don't like the fire anymore... Daddy, turn off the fire please..." Over and over. If you're a parent, you know that voice that is as much whine as concern? Yeah, that was the voice she was using.
Again, the first time I figured she was just startled, but when she did this again at midnight, on the nose, I began to freak out a bit. She asked me to turn off her humidifier, and she calmly drifted back to sleep. In an effort to combat the cough, I turned it back on once she was out.
But not me. I laid awake trying to figure out what medicine we had given her (which I genuinely did not know, I was at a meeting.) and how much and whether or not she was having a bad acid trip. Since Anny is not feeling 100% either, she took medicine and has no recollection of the nights activities, which I realized was the case as they were going on so I could not rely on her for help or insight.
So I laid there. Helplessly thinking about what we may or may not have inflicted on our beloved daughter. I finally could not stand it anymore, so I got up and went into her room. I felt for a fever. Nope. I checked her pulse, which was normal for her. I woke her up just enough to know that she was conscious again. I was so concerned that I gave her the riot act - what is your name, who am I, give me a kiss - things that she all did, and probably thought it was a game. To me, it was not a game. I needed answers.
She looked again with the big eyes and asked for a "colder pillow" so I flipped hers. That worked. She laid her head down and once again started with "Dally I don't like the fire anymore... Daddy, turn off the fire please..."
This time she pointed, though. This time, she put my mind at ease. This time, you see, she was able to tell me what the problem was. It seems that Abby, in her deepest of sleep, could not use a five syllable word. The whole conversation would have been different before if she could have, but it never occurred to her or to me that she might be saying:
"I am listening and I can hear...
It's cold in here...
Dally I don't like the HUMIDI-fire anymore...
Daddy, turn off the HUMIDIFIER please..."
Stupid cow humidifier that puts out a bit of fog that can be taken as smoke in the head of a 2 year old. She was not scared. She was not concerned. She was genuinely being bothered by her humidifier and wanted it turned off. The wide eyes were surely because it was just too dark and she was looking for the noise.
I turned off the humidifier, she laid down and was out almost instantly.
And I laid awake again. This time frustrated that I did not ask the right questions.
February 03, 2010
Wordless Wednesday: Ain't Nobody Gonna Hold Me Down
Climbing to the TOP!
Originally uploaded by armonroe
More WW entries at www.wordlesswednesday.com.
(And for the words that accompany this photo, check out my last post...)
February 01, 2010
A Bouncy Trouncy Pouncy Fun Fun Fun Day!
Over the last week the weather folks have been telling us it would snow.
Turns out that Anny and I both left the house with different destinations just as the first flakes fell. Not a big deal when you're expecting an inch - but surely made our trips slippery. We got out and back safely, thank goodness!
While Anny went for groceries and a haircut (and an "it was right beside the Hair Cuttery" trip to Michaels for craft stuff"), I took Abby to Columbia to a classmates fifth birthday party. It was held at the AIRMania Fun Zone, which I had heard about but never gotten a chance to go to. Their "public sessions" are from 10 to 2 during week days - so we're not exactly going to have a chance to play with their stuff often. The set up is pretty amazing - they have eight inflatable moon bounces, all inside and split into two zones of four. Abby was a bit hesitant, as is her routine when we enter someplace new. Because Anny has never been on a moon bounce, she would be content that Abby never be on one. Ever. For her whole life. Yeah, it takes daddy-daughter time to crush that, right? :o) (Anny was supposed to take her, but I was able to at the last minute. Thank goodness!)
After about two minutes of staring at the mammoth jumping houses - she grabbed a friend and they took off. It's funny, I don't know if she could tell from the outsides, but she picked them in progressively harder stages. She started off with the standard moon bounce - square with mesh to keep them in. They worked together, Abby and Abbie (yes, really.) helped each other up onto different pieces, and followed each other all over the place. It was really fun to watch them!
I was really proud of Abby for working her way up and challenging herself to do things she did not think she could.
I really should have gotten her a snack about halfway through but didn't think about it and payed the price. She got really whiny when another party showed up and they were "restricted" to zone 2. The pieces are about the same, just with different looks. She was trying to be stubborn about it, but I can be even more stubborn - especially when it means not ruining someone elses' party!
The hosts also had pizza and cake for the kids (and parents, too) which was fun.
I got to talk with some of the other parents about parenting in general and each of our children as individuals. One dad asked if I volunteered at the daycare. I was a little caught off guard, to be completely honest. He had noticed that all of the children were approaching me (one little girl even dragged me around to help her find someone else) and many knew my name, or at least knew me as "Abby Monroe's Daddy!" I told him that I hardly ever even pick Abby up, but when I do I am sure to get on the floor and talk with them and sing whatever they are singing and do their silly dances. It makes a world of difference, let me tell you!
And yes, I realize this will probably only be a good way to get to know her friends until she hits elementary school. Then it's going to be catch as catch can, right?
I drove very, very slowly on the trip home while Abby slept to recover from all of the fun. It was a great time!
- On Monday it was "hey folks, snow to the south, nothing here.
- Tuesday brought "we can't be sure, but it's likely just going to be a dusting"
- Wednesday and Thursday the projection went to "maybe an inch or two around town"
- On Friday it because "big storm in the NC and Southern VA, but at most two inches around the beltway"
Turns out that Anny and I both left the house with different destinations just as the first flakes fell. Not a big deal when you're expecting an inch - but surely made our trips slippery. We got out and back safely, thank goodness!
While Anny went for groceries and a haircut (and an "it was right beside the Hair Cuttery" trip to Michaels for craft stuff"), I took Abby to Columbia to a classmates fifth birthday party. It was held at the AIRMania Fun Zone, which I had heard about but never gotten a chance to go to. Their "public sessions" are from 10 to 2 during week days - so we're not exactly going to have a chance to play with their stuff often. The set up is pretty amazing - they have eight inflatable moon bounces, all inside and split into two zones of four. Abby was a bit hesitant, as is her routine when we enter someplace new. Because Anny has never been on a moon bounce, she would be content that Abby never be on one. Ever. For her whole life. Yeah, it takes daddy-daughter time to crush that, right? :o) (Anny was supposed to take her, but I was able to at the last minute. Thank goodness!)
After about two minutes of staring at the mammoth jumping houses - she grabbed a friend and they took off. It's funny, I don't know if she could tell from the outsides, but she picked them in progressively harder stages. She started off with the standard moon bounce - square with mesh to keep them in. They worked together, Abby and Abbie (yes, really.) helped each other up onto different pieces, and followed each other all over the place. It was really fun to watch them!
I was really proud of Abby for working her way up and challenging herself to do things she did not think she could.
I really should have gotten her a snack about halfway through but didn't think about it and payed the price. She got really whiny when another party showed up and they were "restricted" to zone 2. The pieces are about the same, just with different looks. She was trying to be stubborn about it, but I can be even more stubborn - especially when it means not ruining someone elses' party!
The hosts also had pizza and cake for the kids (and parents, too) which was fun.
I got to talk with some of the other parents about parenting in general and each of our children as individuals. One dad asked if I volunteered at the daycare. I was a little caught off guard, to be completely honest. He had noticed that all of the children were approaching me (one little girl even dragged me around to help her find someone else) and many knew my name, or at least knew me as "Abby Monroe's Daddy!" I told him that I hardly ever even pick Abby up, but when I do I am sure to get on the floor and talk with them and sing whatever they are singing and do their silly dances. It makes a world of difference, let me tell you!
And yes, I realize this will probably only be a good way to get to know her friends until she hits elementary school. Then it's going to be catch as catch can, right?
I drove very, very slowly on the trip home while Abby slept to recover from all of the fun. It was a great time!
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